Christmas Eve 2011

Sometimes, the simple things mean everything..
And at times like these, I am especially grateful for His grace and glory;
I am so very blessed to spend Christmas surrounded by my loved ones.

This picture is the perfect example of a simple yet warm memory,
Something to recall on every Christmas from now.
And to smile about as I am reminded of the simple yet irreplaceable joy.

Perhaps it is the knowing that nothing will last that adds a tinge of sadness into this joyful season..
Then again, have a Merry Christmas y'all!

Loving each and every single one of you. <3

泪人

女人
总会有哭成泪人的时候
爱惜每一次的开心
享受每一刻的幸福
也别忘了
珍重每一滴流下的眼泪

心
若不在被牵动不再被感动
不再悲伤，也不会再看到那原有的阳光

人
往往忽略失落
会为快乐带来更大的满足

：）

我不配

你的冷漠，你的狠心。
怎么都觉得如此熟悉？

一样的泪水，不一样的夜晚，
我再次回到同一个地方。
是执著，是落魄，
还是怕寂寞带来的疑惑。

我寻找知音，
哪怕只是一个懂我的眼神。
你的承诺，历历在目。

这一夜，
你选择躲避，狠狠把握推进漩涡。
你口里的冷静，我惟有静听。

退缩，
我无处可躲。

重点不在谁的愧迁，
或许终点不是今天。
无奈建立的，
一夜塌毁，眼前，
只剩由时间来摧毁的昨天。

怒，
怎么让自己再次坠落。


悲，
我真的真的曾经以为..

第三章：重来

不简单，却无法否认心里的快感。

幸福，
靠近的太离谱。

伸手触摸眼前的快乐，深受无比的笑容。

回首凝望背后的伤口，发现回忆无奈，
从未释手。

得寸进尺的人类，
想拥有，想占有，想独霸所有。

是自己冲昏了头，差点，失手。

幸福，骄傲得不甘被掌握。
它，
要你先学会承受。

这万籁俱寂的夜晚，
重拾防备的心：防守。


我

要学会放手。

-完-

第二章：看清

需要多大的勇气。
不停下的雨，埋没了理智。
打开不可收回的伤痛，
发起似乎没有终点的哀悲。
鲜血泪水，
都不是你我要看到的片尾。
悬崖，欲坠。
还好，不至于如此愚昧。
阳光


结束了寒冬。


感激，不尽。

第一章：坠落

口里的甜头，他手里的自由。

紧握幻想的背后，痛苦的泉由。

努力上游，模糊了他人的劝告。

奋不顾身，没有期望是最好的防备。

即时狼狈，
也不想后悔。

努力的追，穿越荆棘却忽视伤痛。
再大的浪水，都无法打击这奋斗的心肺。

让人敬佩，
却也让身心疲惫。


最终

停顿了脚步，

让一切随时间逝退。


-待续-

寂寞，就好

每一个笑容，
都回来到受考验的时候。
你，
今天的笑容，
是否发自内心，或又是强迫自己面对现实最好的伪装呢？

身心开始追不上生活的节奏，
无所谓，
你在目的地等我就好。

我需要寻找那力量和勇气，
应付这突如其来的空虚。

我，
寂寞寂寞就好。

=)

a new chapter

And so I'm officially graduating..


..with First Class Honours :)

Giving all glory to Him really.
For without Him,
we are nothing.

A new chapter begins.
A new journey awaits.

Started work today as well.

So many different challenges to take up.
Hello hello July!
I'm excited, nervous, nostalgic..



So scrambled are my thoughts that I can't even blog properly.
My words are all over the place, I know.

Guess I better sign off now.
"Big Day" tomorrow.
(oh wait, in less than 8 hours actually)

Toodles.

xoxo

The little things that count

九年。
谈不上长，
却说不上短。

最难得的，
莫过于还是可以
一起无聊。

看透了所谓的天长地久，
所谓的友谊万岁。
只要，
偶尔联络，
偶尔见面，
偶尔关心，
也已足够。

最主要，
还是那份真诚的心。

正式踏入生命的另一个阶段，
衷心祝福，
让每一天都过得快乐，
没有遗憾。

To a brighter future. ♥

C-H-A-N-G-E

I recently realized I'm a sucker for constancy.
I hate changes,
whether for the good or for the bad.

It's dysfunctional. Like really, I know.
The elements of uncertainty and surprise that comes with the changes are just,
suffocating and oh-so-petrifying.

I hold on too much,
and I let go too little.
Imbalance much?
I seem to take every word people say so seriously,
that when disappointment comes,
I become so..
vulnerable.

Insecurity,
they term it so.

But guess I never learn, do I?

¿Posible, no?

I woke up from the same nightmare,
twice.
The same fear,
the same tears.
I never knew it was possible.

Part of me died again,
to the same old song,
at the same old spot.
I never knew it was possible.

The heartache so consuming,
the promises so vivid.
I trusted, again.
I never knew it was possible.

The pain enduring,
lasting longer than it should.
Waking up in tears, again.
I never knew it was possible.

And I chose to love again,
through the rain,
through the darkest of days.
I never knew it was possible.

Or is it?

Misunderstood

You never said.
You thought.

You thought I would knwo how to react.
You never cared to explain.

You thought that by giving and sacrificing,
peace would be achieved.
You never cared to ask.

You thought that what I did was to accuse,
You never bothered finding out.

You thought that I was all that you said,
You never tried to understand.

Back to square one

You said to wait till you get back.
I kept my hopes up high.

Restless, yet hope ignites.
The thought tat we might be able to talk this over.

and then i forgot.
How cud i stupidly miss,
the big huge wall that stands between our feet.

I tried calling out,
I did.
But then again,
I cudn't reach.

I dun wanna leave

It's not the same.
It can't be.

I'm trying to drill this in my mind.

Despite the exact same loneliness, the dread, the feeling of despair.
I refuse to acknowledge the similarities,
for I know,
this is different.

why do I see myself at the top of a spiral staircase then?
What if this is only the beginning of the end?

The distance.
The miscommunication.
The little cracks.

The heartache that follows suit.
The sleepless nights.
The tearless cries when you know no one would care.

All so familiar, yet I can do nothing.

Im on a road called doubt,
and now i realized how I have stupidly depend on you,
too much.
As needy as before,
as demanding as ever.

How do i get back on track before its too late?

Helado

I see the trail I left behind.
I see how it has lost it precious moments.
What is eluded from me,
is the reason that lies between,
and the road that lies ahead.

The source of confusion is self-inflicted, they say.
If the choice was clear,
why still do words and stories hurt me like no other?

Its a circle, a mean cycle.

I wanna get off.

Estoy muy triste.

Easy.
Straightforward.

Por que?

Something's misplaced.
Not lost.
Yet it had not return.

Mi mejor amiga esta lejos de mi.
Muchos lejos.

The metaphorical distance.
It kills.

Helado.
Haha.

The little initials

Hola readers!
Had a happy Chinese New Year?

Time for updates, I know.
But my mind is blank.

Except for maybe this.

I miss you.
I miss talking to you.

Well, I guess we dun talk tat much.
But I miss how I know you were there even though when we are not talking to each other.
There, I think that explains it best.

Guess the time isn't right, or is it?

Still, time has it. :)

stumbling upon the ugly truth

全世界都停了电。

越过那不被允许的界限，
揭开不为人知的一面。
我懂得的，不再懂得，
我珍惜的，不再需要我的爱护。

我的心胸狭窄，
还未学会看不见。
看不见你们的伪装，
看不见你们的虚伪，
看不见，
你所谓对我的好，
有多好多好。

是我冲动下定论？
是我判你于死刑？
还是证据，
隐藏着，
却万分真实？

我以为你懂。
我以为你真的懂。
谎言和背叛，
会是多么的痛。

可怕的是你戴上的面具。
在我面前，
好好一套。
在我背后，
插着多少刀？

怎么一切那么熟悉？
朋友间的火战，
那份伤心，失望，和愤怒。
不同的，
这次我似乎已经绝望，
我似乎已经看破，
也许是我，是我不配拥有，
朋友。

不同的是，
我们曾是同一阵线，
就你和我，相依为命么？
可笑。
多么可笑。

投入他人的怀抱！去！
我不需要。
就算这一个不妙也好，
我一个人没有什么大不了。

你的笑，
不再牵连我的心跳。

没有伪装的需要。

Preliminary emotions.
The journey of truth-seeking.
Forgiving.

And most importantly,
forgetting.

Starts here.

2011

Saying the usual goodbyess? =p

Second day of a brand new year.
Felt any unusual-ness yet?
Other than the 6 percent govt tax, that is.

Starting work tomorrow makes me cranky.
and depressed.
and sad.
and upset.
and the list goes on. =)

Okay.
Let's be positive.
WooHoo!


Nah, just to scare you with my freaky face. :p

Wat has 2010 brought me, exactly?
Okay. Let's start counting.
This will be a much happier post (i think) compared to resolution's post.
You know, the one where we make all kinds of goals and promises?
Haha.

But there's so many freaking things I dunno where to start!
You know what? I'll just pick 5.
FIVE things that come to mind, deal?

One. I took a huge step. Leaving something once treasured in the past. Not easy. Never is. But yea, I did it. Im sure this ranks number one.

Two. I found my sunshine. Greatest gift. Enough said. =)

Three. Finished my studies at UCSI. Literally. No more classes. No more college student. This is saddenning. =(

Four. How my friends amaze me. Like, all of them. Life wouldn't be the same without them, and somehow, He helped me to see this through little twists and turns. I love them to bits.

Five. Went on a trip with siblings without the parents. Definite success!

I'm grateful for all that happened, and all that has been given to me.

I believe everything happens for a reason, and it is all good in the hands of God. =)

That basically sums it all. Hmm. So people,

let bygones be bygones.

That will be my very first resolution of the year.

More to come! =))

xoxo